Oh, well, I guess that's cool. I mean, I don't know you, and you don't know me, so I guess outside is best, you know. Here I go. Good night.

NO! You dense, irritating, miniature beast of burden! Ogres are like onions! End of story! Bye-bye! See ya later. By night one way, by day another / Thus shall be the norm / Till you receive true love's kiss / then, take love's true form."

Shrek, his swamp filled with fairytale creatures, angrily glares at Donkey] Donkey: Hey, don't look at me, I didn't invite them! Pinocchio: Oh, gosh, no one invited us. Shrek: What? Pinocchio: We were forced to come here. Shrek: By who?! Little Pig: Lord Farquaad! He hoofed und he poofed und he signed an eviction notice. Shrek: All right. Who knows where is Farquaad guy is? Donkey: Oh, I do. I know where he is. Shrek: Does anyone else know where to find him?

Size & Servings: The cake shown is a 6 inchround top tier on a 10 inchround base. The whole cake sits on a 12 inch cake board. It serves up to 35 guests. This is gonna be fun! We can stay up late, swappin' manly stories, and in the mornin'... I'm makin' waffles. Probably the most accurate attempt in this list. However, I doubt a one year old is going to be able to appreciate that fact. I don’t remember Shrek having huge feminine eyelashes. But hey, maybe this is fine. Artistic license and that. Maybe it’s for some poor chap with big bushy eyebrows and lady lashes, who gets called Shrek as an affection in-joke. Without knowing the whole story, who are we to judge.

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Personalisation: Each cake is skilfully finished by our own cake decorators and can be personalised to suit your own celebration or sent as a gift. But ya gotta have friends... Shrek: Donkey! Stop singing! Well, it's no wonder you don't have any friends. Donkey: Wow! Only a true friend would be that truly honest. Shrek: Listen, little donkey. Take a look at me, what am I? Donkey: Uh... [looks Shrek up and down] Really tall? Shrek: No! I'm an ogre! Y’know, "Grab your torch and pitchforks!" Doesn't that bother you? Donkey: [shakes his head happily] Nope. Shrek: [surprised] Really? Donkey: Really, really. You know, I do too. That's another thing we have in common. Like I hate it when you got somebody in your face. You'retrying to give them a hint, and they won't leave. And there's that big awkward silence you know?